The valley of humiliation

Hello again everyone.  Have you missed me?  For me this time doing my every day mundane chores have been very difficult. When things are exciting I can see God working in my life.  It is when I am just hanging out, doing every day things that it is very difficult to live life.  What?!?!  Have I lost my mind?  Do I really have to answer that?  Let's just say that I have not lost my mind, yet!  I know I put it somewhere in a box, which is probably up in VT right now under tarp.  But rest assured that I will make a thorough search for it when I get back there. 

This is my sister on her way up to MT Washington with
the boys several years ago

Of course I have not lost my mind, nor placed it into a box.  That would be impossible.  But seriously, let me explain myself (you had to ask).  I have found that when life is exciting, that it is easy to check myself and take inventory of what God is doing and how I am responding to Him. When things are exciting, God shows me things about myself that I have to check, and sometimes ditch (more than sometimes I have to ditch things and start out new). 

I was just recently on a spiritual mountaintop.  I don't know how many of you have been on a mountain top.  It is beautiful and a lot of work to get there.  The air is so much clearer than down in the valley.  The view from the top is great too.  I mean, everything is so small in the valley.  I love watching the cars from the top.  They are all so unreal.  I love being in the mountains.  They don't have to be high mountains.  Sean and Tom have climbed the highest mountain in New England.  That is too much for me.  I just want a little mountain that isn't so big so I don't feel like I will fall off.  So, I was on my mountain top.  I guess I had been there for a while and I forgot that really I can't stay there, even if I want to.  I had to come down, and I did, kicking and screaming.  When I did, I found the air much to thick for me to breathe and I just didn't like the noise and the crowds.  What a mess down here in the valley of humiliation.  But what a great place to be!  I am so glad I came down from my mountain top.  It took me a long time to get readjusted to the valley.  There is great value in our mundane chores.

When you are selling a house everything is on display.  And I mean everything.  We all know how well I keep my house (for you who don't know I am very bad at it).  So the minute others come into the house everything I have done is on display.  What a humiliation for me. 

But through all that, God showed me something so much more valuable in this valley of humiliation.  He showed me again my absolute and desperate need for His Son, our Lord the Christ.  In my own power I am an utter and miserable failure.  There is nothing I can do right, as He  has shown me through the sale (or I have to say the non-sale of the house).  I have been thinking that if I give it my best, my absolute best, the sale of the house is in the bag. VT here we come and we will live like pioneers (it was one of Logan's vocab words last week).  Everyone will look at us in admiration and say, "Wow, they are a little crazy but look at what they are doing.  I could  never do that."  My ego will be stroked plenty and my chip on the old back will grow.  After all, we are doing great things for Christ, aren't we?  Are we?  Let me think about that for a moment (and I'm afraid you are coming with me on my thought journey).  I am putting in my best, making my house clean as a whistle, washing the windows scrubbing the floors doing my best to present the house so that someone likes it.  And I get a negative feedback.  But I have done my best, Lord.  For YOU!  Well, no.  My best is to continually die to self and let Him take my life, renew it, cleanse me from my sin (which in itself is amazing) and give me a new life through the Holy Spirit.  And yet, I was on my mountaintop, relishing in my experience with God.  Christ had to send me back into the valley to smell the mess for me to realize that I can't give it my best.  I can only give my heart!
I have added a little video clip.  I have loved this song because it is just so beautiful.  Sean has it as my ring tone on his phone.  I didn't know why he picked it, but after this week the song has a different meaning.  He picked it very well.  Listen to the words.  They are so simple and yet do we give Him what He asks for? Am I giving Him myself, without reaching back and trying to take control and try to handle thing my way, but with His intentions in mind?  I hope you enjoy this video.  If you are like me, grab some tissues and a cup of tea or coffee. (Dad this is not an advertisement :) )

As far as the house up north things are doing well.  We were just up there this week.  I just love to see the house up there.  The weather was absolutely beautiful, almost summer like.  We had a great time building and were very busy bees.  I don't have any pictures because.. I don't want to go into that too.  That is a whole other blog for the future.

Take care and if any of you are in the valley, you are at a great place.  Enjoy where you are at and when you are ready, make a trek to the mountain top.  It is worth the workout.  But don't stay too long on the mountain.  Eventually you also have to come back into the valley to take care of the mundane things. 

Blessings to all