Come one come all

 

Merry Christmas everyone.  I am sorry that it's been a while since I have written a blog.  There is so much going on that it is sometimes hard to share it all.  No, the house is not finished.  But I don't really care.  We are happy where God has put us and we are learning to live within the means that we have right now.  Complaining happens sometimes and so does the nagging but they are few and far between. 



We just spent Thanksgiving in Connecticut with the in-laws.  I can tell you that it was quite

Natasha the turkey

interesting with the nieces and nephews running around with each other, singing at the top of their voices the tunes from the latest Disney movie.  And yes, my 20 year old daughter was one of the singers.  It was so much fun to see the younger ones playing along with their older cousins.  Us adults were well behaved, as you might imagine, when the Perreault clan gets together.  I have no evidence of any strange behaviors of adults, such as the conga backrub line.  For more incriminating evidence, visit my facebook page.  

I am not dinner!

   

Conga line for backrubs?

 

 But enough of such silly things.  We are looking forward to Christmas, this year again with the Perreault clan.  It's been a while for us to spend Christmas eve with them.  We are looking forward to it.  But anyway, I didn't set out to write this blog all about our Christmas plans.  I have started this blog three times now, and I am finally trying to get it right.

 

I think by now everyone knows about the fact that I have found a publisher for a great little story I was blessed to write (well it is a very, very long story at 600 pages!!!!!).  I am so excited about it, but at this stage the excitement has faded some and reality is setting in.  When the publisher contacted me in late September, October I would have signed over my children and my dog for the story to get published.  At this point I have calmed down a little.  I am more settled and can think rationally again. 

 

When I was young, I loved stories.  They became a really important part of my life.  I would be happy to snuggle up with a book.  I had trouble sleeping, so at night I would make up incredible and crazy adventures.  When I went to boarding school, my second year was incredibly lonely.  I had no friends.  And when you have school until one in the afternoon, there is a lot of time for nothing.  I was very studious at that time, because I had a lofty goal.  But there was still a lot of time for me, myself and I.  So we made up this story and over the years it became more and more important to me.  I would retreat to my imagination whenever things got rough. 

 

Fast forward ten years ago.  I was in a really hard place in my life.  Things were tough and I couldn't face them.  My wonderful hero husband went to bat for me and finally got me out of the mess I was in, but in the meantime, I retreated.  I was in such a bad place, that often time I didn't even get out of bed.  I would stay in my room, more importantly in my imagination.  It was a very cozy place.  A place I found comfort in.  When the whole mess was over, I finally came out of my little happy place and rejoined the rest of the family again. 

 

It was then that God started talking to me.  He wanted me to stop running to my imagination.  He wanted me to stop daydreaming!  The audacity!  I couldn't!  I was so involved with the characters in my mind, that they had become real and important to me.   In the end I said that I just couldn't stop talking to my friends (characters in the story).  I argued again and again about the impossibility (hint: don't argue with the creator of the universe.  I seem to be doing that a lot!).  This went on for quite some time.  I tried to stop daydreaming but in the end I would always go back.  It was like an addiction when I was depressed.  So then I got my little awakening.  He said to me, you are having an adulterous relationship!  Yikes!  That got my attention!  I asked how to stop and we worked out a pretty good plan.  I have not gone back to that dark place where I need my story to make it through the day.  So now fast forward to early this year.  I was done with the story I wrote for Tasha (10 years in the making) and I thought, that was fun.  What's next, God?      

 I did not expect and answer right away but I got one, and it was a little scary.  I shared last blog that He wanted me to write 'the story'.  Well, I argued again.  Like I shared, it would be too personal.  As I finally started opening my heart to hear what God had to say to me, I began to say, all right.  But I can't trust my heart, because I want to go back and see how my characters are doing.  In my heart I was afraid that if I went back, I would start to run to my imagination every time the going got tough again.  So, God just asked me to trust Him and to obey.  I was willing to let Him lead me all the way.  And over the next couple of weeks, it became obvious that God wanted me to write the story.

Here is what He shared with me as I wrote.  He shared that there was going to be a lot of healing, and I, of course, thought that I was doing just fine.  Well, there was a lot of healing.  He showed me that through the creative process how much fun He had creating me.  Since I was His creation, He was not just going to sit back and watch from afar.  He wanted to be intimately involved with my life.  He also showed me that when the chips are down, He is right there beside me.  I was writing a particular hard part of the story and I was grieving for my characters.  In that moment I knew that in ten or more pages all the hardships would be over.  That is the same with God.  He is right there beside us when we go through hardships and he is cheering us on.  Because He knows the end results!  Just like I knew the end result of the story, He knows the outcome of mine.  And just like me as the author, He does not just leave me hanging.  What a beautiful picture He gave me.

He also talked to me about the adulterous part.  It was not because of the content of my story, but it

was by retreating into my own little world, I was shutting out the rest of the world.  My kids couldn't follow me into my imagination.  I was the only one who could.  And so by me writing it down, He brought this story that I had kept in my darkest imagination into the light!  Now, everyone can read it.  And that is why this story will be published!  But not on my own time line.  When God deems it's time, there will be nothing stopping me!  That is soooo cool.  He brought about a lot of healing just by brining out the story into the light.

So I really hope that this story will be out there soon, but I am willing to take a breath and not run on my emotions.  I am glad that we took a step back from when the publisher contacted me.  I needed to think things through.  And it is giving Tom a chance to look through my story.  He has done a really good job looking through it and talking about little areas that didn't quite flow well.  So, prayers are definitely appreciated.

Because whoever knows me, knows how incredibly patient (NOT) I am.  I would have liked to have seen this story in the stores by Christmas, but that is not going to happen.  And I have to be all right with that.  Because when it does come out, and it will, it has to be really good.  I can't change the way people see me when they read what I have written.  I put my thoughts out there for others to see and to evaluate.  That is one scary thought.  So, we are going to work on it some more. 

I don't really care if I offend someone with what I write, but I care to represent my Lord with honor.  I have to share the story about my laptop.  The thing is now 13 years old, okay!  It has seen better days.  When I started writing this story, I was praying that I would continue to write until God shut me down.  And that laptop was pretty iffy if it would start.  So, as I started writing, trusting and obeying what God had told me to do, the thing just started getting better and better!  I'm not kidding you!  I had a hinge that was busted.  Sean tried to fix it, and it just kept popping out.  It's fixed!  It just fixed itself (well not really, you get the picture?).  As I was writing there were a lot of verses God And Mary said, behold the Lord's handmaiden.  Be it onto me according to thy word."  That verse became so real to me.  I was living it.  So I decorated my laptop with the verses God was giving me.  Tasha drew a beautiful soaring bald eagle on the front and I wrote the verses around it.  I have to admit I got the idea from Sean.
was talking to me about, but one of them was really important to me.  "

There was a part of the story that made me realize just how involved God is in whatever I do.  I was at home, writing away.  It was a great part of the story.  And I was rubbing my hands together in glee.  Suddenly the laptop died!  Just shut down.  I was plugged in and everything.  It hadn't given me

any problems since I started writing.  And I just lost ten pages of the very juicy part of my story!  Okay, I prayed pleading that this wasn't it for my short writing career, and started it up again.  Yup, it stared right up.  I wrote and wrote along the same line I had gone before.  And it shut down on me again.  So I booted up again, without problems and on I went.  Again, lost it when it shut down on me.  I was done!  The next day were are in my office (McDonalds) and I thought about why the stupid laptop kept on shutting down.  Then I realized it.  The story was taking a route where God wasn't honored!  He didn't want me to write that way.  I switched and reworked the story.  The computer hasn't shut down on me since!  I thought that was absolutely amazing!

I hope that this story is an encouragement for you during a time that for many can be really tough.  I want you to be encouraged.  And hope you have a Merry Christmas!